


Come back to me

by highfuncti0ningfangirl



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, F/M, Reader-Insert
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-07
Updated: 2019-11-07
Packaged: 2021-01-25 03:50:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 9,942
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21349768
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/highfuncti0ningfangirl/pseuds/highfuncti0ningfangirl
Summary: You’re one of the few Avengers who survived the snap, and you’re mourning the loss of all your friends who didn’t survive the snap, and Loki, your soulmate, who has died at the hands of Thanos. Five years later, when Scott Lang comes up with the idea of time travel and Tony manages to work it out, a glimmer of hope emerges, and you have a final chance to save your friends… and maybe even Loki.
Relationships: Loki (Marvel)/Reader, Loki/Reader
Comments: 6
Kudos: 65





	1. Come back to me (pt.1)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You’re one of the few Avengers who survived the snap, and you’re mourning the loss of all your friends who didn’t survive the snap, and Loki, your soulmate, who has died at the hands of Thanos. Five years later, when Scott Lang comes up with the idea of time travel and Tony manages to work it out, a glimmer of hope emerges, and you have a final chance to save your friends… and maybe even Loki.

You still had nightmares.

Five years later they still came to you in your sleep, the memories and images of your friends, no, your family, turning to dust. They were there one minute and gone the next. You could remember clinging to Thor, thinking that he couldn’t go too, he was like your brother, he couldn’t be taken from you too, not after… no, don’t think about him. Not Loki. Those were the worst nightmares, the ones that hadn’t allowed you to sleep for months after his death, where you woke up sweating and sobbing and reaching out for him, only to realize that it wasn’t a nightmare… it had really happened. The first few months had been torture; no one had known what to do or say. Gradually it began to get easier, the raw pain turning into a dull ache, and most people began to move on with their lives… but not you. Thor left within the first couple of months, and you’d been tempted to follow him, but figured you owed it to everyone who wasn’t there anymore to work alongside Nat, Steve, Rocket, Rhodey and the others who’d decided not to give up, to try and work out a way to bring them back, as far-fetched as it may seem. Tony left too, to start his new life with Pepper, leaving you lonelier than ever. Tony had been like a father to you, and as much as you wanted to leave the pain behind, you couldn’t just start a new life and pretend it had never happened. Besides, where would you go? The Avengers compound was your home. So, you stayed.

For five years.

Until one day, everything changed. And change came in the form of Scott Lang.

You sat and listened to this seemingly crazy dude with Natasha and Steve, exchanging bewildered looks when he began to talk about time travel and a place called the ‘quantum realm’. When he was done, there were several moments of silence.

“Time travel.” Steve said. Scott nodded.

“We need Tony.” You said, and Nat nodded vigorously. And suddenly there was a glimmer of hope. 

Your trip to Tony proved unsuccessful, and you couldn’t say you blamed him for not wanting to risk his perfect life for a crazy scheme that might not even work. You could see how happy he was with Pepper and Morgan, and you were reluctant to remind him of Peter, and of how not everyone had been as lucky as him and Pepper, having the chance to start a new life.

Your next option was Bruce, or ‘Professor Hulk’ as you decided to start calling him when you saw him, who luckily was more helpful, and willing to try Scott’s crazy idea. Which turned out to be not such a crazy idea when (after a few inconveniences) it worked. It really worked. As you stood before Scott (present day Scott, not baby or 97-year-old Scott) who had just come back from the first test run and looked pretty shaken up, your mind started to work double time, thinking of all the possibilities that had just been opened up… maybe you could go back to before Thanos got hold of the tesseract, to save Loki…

“Time travel!” announced Bruce happily.

A day had passed, and you hadn’t got any further in working out how to move forward with your delicate system of time travel, until Tony showed up. He had the answer, and that’s when you became certain that this was going to work. It had to work, because now you’d been given hope.

You went to meet Thor (who wasn’t exactly looking his best) in ‘New Asgard’ and bring him back to the Avengers compound, to formulate a plan. You had worked out where all the stones were, three in New York, two on Vormir and Morag, and one in Asgard, and now you had to decide who would go where. Clint and Natasha would go to Vormir for the soul stone, Rhodey and Nebula to Morag for the power stone, Thor and Rocket to Asgard to collect the aether from Jane, which left you, Tony, Steve and Scott to go to New York, to get the time and mind stones, and the tesseract.

This decision hadn’t been made lightly on your part, you were going back to a time where Loki didn’t know you, didn’t love you, and was being controlled by Thanos, which was hardly your idea of a fun time. Tony had taken you to one side and reminded you of this after you’d made your decision.

“Y/N, are you sure?” he’d asked you, with a worried expression on his face. “We don’t want you to, well…”

“Mess things up?” you’d asked, a hint of a smile on your face.

“Yes obviously, but that’s not what I was going to…”

“Tony, I’ll be fine. The tesseract is the priority, we need this to work.”

He nodded, looking relived.

“As long as you’re sure Y/N.”

And that’s how you’d wound up in a time travel suit, with a bracelet on your wrist which was about to suck you back into 2012 New York, where a huge battle was raging, and more importantly, where three infinity stones were located in close proximity to each other.

You stood in a circle with the others, who all looked how you felt – incredibly nervous.

Steve said some words, but you weren’t listening; all you could hear was a ringing in your ears, and all you could think about was the fact that you were about to see Loki again, really see him, alive.

You looked up to see everyone putting their hands in the middle of the circle, and you followed suit, attempting to control your shaking hand.

“Ready?” Tony asked, and everyone gave brisk nods.

“Good luck.”


	2. Come back to me (pt.2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You’re one of the few Avengers who survived the snap, and you’re mourning the loss of all your friends who didn’t survive the snap, and Loki, your soulmate, who has died at the hands of Thanos. Five years later, when Scott Lang comes up with the idea of time travel and Tony manages to work it out, a glimmer of hope emerges, and you have a final chance to save your friends… and maybe even Loki.

Tony gave a countdown from three, and suddenly you were shrinking alongside the others at an incredible rate and flying through the quantum realm. You fought to control your breathing, hardly able to take in what your eyes were seeing, when suddenly the three separate groups split off, and you followed Steve after Scott and Tony. In a flash, you were full sized again, on the streets of New York.

You staggered, and Steve caught you, pulling you upright and pressing the button to uncover your face. You gasped for breath, managing to stand on your own two feet and looking around incredulously. The landscape was painstakingly familiar, although it had been eleven years since the events had unfolded and you had been there to fight alongside your friends against Loki, who you hadn’t known was being controlled by Thanos back then. You immediately glanced up to Stark Tower where you knew Loki was right now, and you felt your heart ache. He was up there.

“Are you okay Y/N?” Steve asked.

“Yeah, thanks.” You smiled at him, dusting yourself off. You were, in fact, the opposite of okay. You had just travelled back eleven years in time and were about to go and see the previously dead love of your life – not exactly a situation you would expect yourself to be chilled out about. A small part of you was hoping that you might be able to save Loki somehow, to prevent the events that wouldn’t happen for another six years, but you also knew that that was hopeless. Your main mission was to get the tesseract back to the present day, but in the back of your mind a small plan was hatching, what if you could find a way to bring Loki back to your present?

But no, you had to remind yourself that 2012 Loki wasn’t your Loki, he didn’t love you… yet.

Tony had been talking, and now he touched your arm gently.

“Y/N.” he said.

“Yes. I’m fine.” You replied, forcing another smile.

“Remember, get the tesseract, and get straight out of there, okay? No detours.” He reminded you.

“Got it, no detours.” You nodded, making direct eye contact with him.

“Okay, let’s go team.” Steve said, and you ducked out into the street, knowing that you couldn’t be seen. You watched Bruce begin to half-heartedly smash things up, and followed Steve, Tony and a tiny Scott Lang towards Stark Tower, your nerves racing.

When you got to the front entrance, Tony held everyone back.

“I’ll wait in the lobby, Steve, you find the undercover Hydra agents, and Y/N head up to where we are and let us know when we’re coming down the elevator. Got it?”

It was the most confusing thing anyone had ever said to you, but you thought you understood.

“See you in a bit.” You said and darted towards the stairs.

When you reached the right floor, you snuck into the room and ducked behind the nearest pillar, so that you were hidden but could also watch what was going on. Your heart was thundering in your chest, not just from your run up a ridiculous number of stairs but from the fact that Loki was just over there. On the other side of the room from you. He was surrounded by the Avengers, including you, so that you couldn’t see him yet.

“If it’s all the same to you, I’ll have that drink now.”

His voice carried across the room to where you were hiding, and the sound of it felt like a punch to the stomach. You stared across the room, your heart racing, but then were forced to hide again as 2012 Steve turned around and started talking about what to do next.

You listened as 2012 you conversed with the others (a very odd experience) and waited for you all to walk past into the elevator as you remembered. Resisting the urge to peek back around the pillar, you heard 2023 Tony’s voice in your ear.

“We’re in position.”

“We’re about to come down.” You whispered, so that no one in the room would hear you.

2012 Steve said something, and Loki turned into him and imitated him. You couldn’t remember what he had said, but you did remember having to fight the urge to grin at whatever he had said all those years ago. You had been so young back then, so unaware…

“Shut. Up.” Thor said abruptly, and you knew he was putting the cover over Loki’s mouth.

You moved further behind the pillar as 2012 Tony called the lift, and as the doors opened, he gestured for everyone to get inside. Clint and Nat went in first, followed by Steve and your past self, and then…

Shit.

Thor shoved Loki past your hiding spot towards the elevator, and your breath hitched in your throat as you saw him. He looked so broken and beautiful, covered in bruises and scratches with his messy hair, sharp cheekbones and piercing eyes. He looked so different to your Loki, who you knew and loved, but your heart was still working double time; your hands were still shaking uncontrollably. You wanted to throw yourself at him but reminded yourself that that probably wouldn’t help with your mission. Taking a deep breath, you forced yourself to look away.

Now everyone was in the lift, everyone apart from Hulk that was. Damn, you had forgotten about him.

What were you going to do? Tony and Scott needed you down in the lobby, but the elevator was full, and Hulk was about to make his way angrily down the stairs; you didn’t feel confident following him. You waited until 2012 Tony had told Hulk to take the stairs, the elevator to go and Hulk to get out of the room, and then came out from your hiding spot.

“Tony, Scott, I’m stuck up here, I can’t get down!” you told them desperately.

“What? What do you mean stuck?” Tony replied instantly.

“We’re in the elevator and Hulk is taking the stairs…”

“Y/N, chill, I’ve got you.” Scott said, sounding out of breath.

“How…?” you stopped talking as a skyscraper-sized Scott materialized outside the window. You could hear more screams from the streets below.

“So much for staying out of sight Scott!” Tony said, slightly louder than usual.

“2012 me isn’t here in 2012, and besides, you guys need a distraction.” He replied.

You ran out to the balcony and waved, so that Scott could see where you were, and he placed his hand next to the smashed barrier, which you proceeded jump over. Cupped in Scott’s hand, you were lowered towards the ground at an alarming rate which caused your head to spin – but was definitely faster than both the elevator and the stairs.

“Thanks Scott!” you called, jumping off his hand to the ground.

There was no time for you to stop and settle your dizziness, and everyone was staring at you as you sprinted into the building, which was fair enough, you thought, considering what had just happened. Slowing to a walk as you entered the main lobby, you were just in time to see your 2012 group coming out of the elevator and begin walking across the marble floor, about to be stopped by the men in suits.

“We need you Scott.” Tony said urgently.

“I’m here, I’m here!” Scott panted, running back in normal sized and then shrinking down again.

You couldn’t take your eyes off of the back of Loki’s head, watching as your group were stopped and 2012 Tony started arguing with the suited man at the front. Scott was talking to you as he climbed inside the arc reactor, but you weren’t paying much attention. You had a chance to save Loki; bringing him back to 2023 might work but… he wouldn’t know or love you, and was also still being controlled by Thanos, but if you had the tesseract…? Your mind was racing – you might be able save him, but at a price. Could you live in a world where Loki didn’t love you? Surely that was better than living in a world with no Loki at all, which, you reminded yourself, would be the case if you didn’t get the tesseract back to 2023. It was all so confusing, and you were still dizzy from being lowered down seventy floors in five seconds. Then things started to happen very quickly.

2012 Tony collapsed on to the floor, and everyone’s attention turned to him, all apart from one person in the lobby. Loki’s eyes followed the briefcase with the tesseract in it as Tony fell down, and you realized what was about to happen instantly. Before your brain even had time to register what you were about to do, you were running. Tony and Scott were both yelling in your earpiece, but you could scarcely hear them as you watched Loki reach for the tesseract – you weren’t going to make it.

Heart thudding in your chest, you launched yourself at him as he straightened up, now holding the tesseract in his hands, and collided with him just as he began to disappear in the blue smoke that had surrounded him. You grabbed his arm, and were pulled after him into the darkness.


	3. Come back to me (pt.3)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You’re one of the few Avengers who survived the snap, and you’re mourning the loss of all your friends who didn’t survive the snap, and Loki, your soulmate, who has died at the hands of Thanos. Five years later, when Scott Lang comes up with the idea of time travel and Tony manages to work it out, a glimmer of hope emerges, and you have a final chance to save your friends… and maybe even Loki.

As you were pulled after Loki into the darkness, you thought you might pass out – not just from the dizzying experience of teleporting – but from the fact that you were holding on to his arm. He was really there, alive. Loki was alive. Just as you thought you might cry, your feet hit the ground and you clutched Loki’s arm to stop yourself faceplanting, but you needn’t have worried. Loki had already caught you. By the throat.

Before you had time to take in your surroundings, catch your breath, or do anything other than blink, you had been pushed roughly against the wall with Loki’s hand tight around your neck.

“What. Are you doing.” He said, his voice dangerously low.

Gasping for breath, you desperately grabbed his arm with both of yours, unable to talk. You doubted you would’ve been able to form a sentence even if you weren’t being strangled by your previously dead boyfriend. You locked eyes with him, praying that he would recognize you, and then realized what a bad idea that had been. Your eyes really did fill with tears this time, half from the fact that you couldn’t breathe, and half from the fact that, shit, you had missed those gorgeous eyes so much. But those eyes were different in 2012: clouded with hatred, fear and misery, and you could hardly bear to look at them.

“Hold on…”

All of a sudden, his grip relaxed, and you slid down the wall coughing and gulping for air. Had he recognized you? You saw the tesseract clutched in Loki’s other hand and remembered what Tony had said to you. “No detours.”

Oops.

“You’re Y/N… you’re one of my brothers Midgardian friends.”

The back of your throat burned, and your eyes stung when you heard him say your name with such little recognition, but you forced yourself to stay calm. This was your one chance, and you were not going to waste it. You couldn’t.

“But you look… older.” Loki finished, watching you curiously as you struggled to your feet.

You had to mentally prepare yourself before you could look him in the face again, and this time you managed to hold it together.

“That’s impossible… you were just in the lift, and the lobby, unless…?” he trailed off, still staring at you. You weren’t sure how much longer you could cope with this for; you had to keep reminding yourself that you were here for the tesseract.

“Listen, Loki- “

The words stuck in your throat as you said his name, but no, you had to do this. You tried again.

“Loki. I look older because I am older – I’m from 2023, eleven years in the future. And I followed you here because I need you to give me the tesseract.” You gestured to the glowing blue cube he was still holding.

He looked at you incredulously.

“And why is that.” He questioned.

You opened your mouth, and then closed it again. What on earth were you supposed to tell him?

“Well, whatever your explanation, I’m afraid I won’t be giving you the tesseract.” Loki told you.

You started to protest, but he cut you off.

“Let’s just say that if I give this to you, I die.” He said shortly.

And that’s when you realized where Loki had bought you. Thanos’ ship.

Your brain went into a complete meltdown as a million thoughts rained down on you at once. What if you took the tesseract now? Would Loki die even earlier than he already had? You desperately tried to remember what Bruce had told you about changing actions in the past not affecting a certain timeline, or something along those lines, but none of it had really made sense. You wished you’d paid more attention now; you could feel the panic rising in your throat, but you immediately pushed it back down. You had one job, and that was to retrieve the tesseract and get it back to 2023. Even if that meant leaving Loki here, with Thanos.

“I’m sorry.” You whispered.

The Loki in front of you may not have been the Loki you knew, but you did know how he ticked. You had spent enough hours training with your Loki to know how he fought, and right now while you had the element of surprise, that was enough.

Before he had even realized what you had just said, you’d lunged for the tesseract.

As you had predicted, he swung the tesseract out of your reach just in time and span out of the way, which was actually into the way as you’d correctly guessed where he would move to, and for a heart-stopping second your fingers brushed against the tesseract. The moment was quickly shattered as Loki shoved you backwards and was suddenly holding a knife up to your face, his eyes narrowed.

“You wish me dead?” he asked, cocking an eyebrow.

“No, no, of course I don’t…” you stammered, watching the knife fearfully. Would he really use it against you? You hadn’t factored this into your predictions.

“Why do you insist upon taking this from me then?” he inquired.

Still nervously watching the knife, you knew Loki would soon grow tired of this, and possibly start using said knife. You had to think of a way to make him give you the tesseract.

“Thanos… he doesn’t care what happens to you.” You said tentatively, not knowing exactly where you were going with this.

Loki shot you a confused look, but before he could say anything you pressed on.

“I’m from eleven years in the future, I know what happens… to you.” You told him. You knew he believed you, but could you tell him he’d been killed? Would that affect anything? Knowing Loki’s levels or curiosity it wouldn’t make much difference now, you’d have to tell him.

“What does that mean? What ‘happens’ to me?” he scowled, but you could see the fear in his eyes. Your heart was physically hurting in your chest, almost to the point where it was unbearable.

“It won’t happen for another six years yet, but…” you stopped as you saw the realization set in in his eyes.

“He kills me.” He finished for you, in a low voice.

He’d completely let his guard down, and you could practically see the cogs turning in his head, his eyes glazed over slightly. You felt awful, and sick to the stomach, but you knew you had to act now. Before he could realize his mistake, you ducked under his hand holding the knife and snatched the tesseract out of his hand. A second too late he comprehended what had happened and spun around in a panic, knife in hand.

But you were gone.

Clutching the tesseract tightly, you flew through the quantum realm again, and suddenly were back in a circle with Tony, Steve and all the others. You touched the side of your helmet so that your face was uncovered and took a deep breath of air. 2023 air. The tesseract glowed brightly in your hands.

“Did we do it? Did we get them all?” Steve asked immediately, looking around the circle.

“Y/N, thank god, we didn’t know where you… Y/N?” Tony moved towards you worriedly, but then stopped talked as you looked up at him. He looked back at you sadly and wiped a tear away from under your eye. You hadn’t even realized you were crying.

“You did good kid.” He told you, looking at the tesseract and placing a hand on your shoulder gently.

“Nat. Where’s Natasha.” You heard Steve say as if from a distance. Your head snapped up; Tony span around… Nat wasn’t there.

“Clint…”

Clint looked awful, even more awful than you felt. He opened his hand slowly to reveal the soul stone glowing brightly in the palm of his hand.

Devastation slammed into you like a truck, and your eyes filled with fresh tears as you watched Bruce fall to his knees with a loud thud. You hadn’t thought it possible to feel worse than you had two minutes ago, leaving Loki alone on Thanos’ ship with no tesseract, but you’d just been proved utterly and awfully wrong.

You’d managed to get all six Infinity stones, but at an unthinkable cost.

Loki. Nat. Your friends and family who had disappeared in the snap. How many more people you loved were going to be torn away from you?

“This is going to work.” Steve said stubbornly, his voice thick with emotion.

You nodded in agreement. It would work.

It had to.


	4. Come back to me (pt.4)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You’re one of the few Avengers who survived the snap, and you’re mourning the loss of all your friends who didn’t survive the snap, and Loki, your soulmate, who has died at the hands of Thanos. Five years later, when Scott Lang comes up with the idea of time travel and Tony manages to work it out, a glimmer of hope emerges, and you have a final chance to save your friends… and maybe even Loki.

The next hour or so was spent in near silence down by the lake.

No one could seem to be able to actually comprehend that Nat was dead, that she was gone and wasn’t coming back – despite the fact that Clint had described what had happened so vividly you’d almost been able to picture it. It was so like Nat, fighting her best friend not for the chance to live, but for the chance to die to save them.

Everyone had told their story of what had happened to them and how they had got hold of each Infinity Stone; you’d barely been able to voice the part where you had left Loki alone on Thanos’ ship, without the tesseract. Everyone was sympathetic towards you, but you knew the main cause of grief here today was nothing to do with you or Loki – you had had your time to grieve five years ago. Five years he had been dead… and yet you’d just seen him, hell you’d even touched him, not two hours ago. Surely there was a way to undo what had happened. But you had more pressing matters to attend to.

Your thoughts were interrupted as Bruce gave a sudden outraged roar and sent a bench flying across the lake into the trees beyond. It seemed to shatter the heavy silence that had been sat over you all.

“Right, come on, no point sitting around waiting for something to happen.” Tony said briskly, standing up. He had been literally the quietest you’d ever heard him the last couple of hours; you prayed that was about to change. You couldn’t stand it.

Steve gave you a watery smile as you stood and offered him a hand to join you – it was awful seeing the strongest people you knew so tired and weak; it made you want to curl up into a small ball and give up. But you had the Infinity Stones, and a chance to bring back everyone who had been lost to the snap; there was no way in hell you were going to give up now.

Back up at the Avengers compound, Tony had crafted a new gauntlet which now held the six stones, and a very large question.

“Who’s going to do it?”

Steve’s question hung heavy in the air as you all stood around the new gauntlet in Tony’s lab. For a while, no one said anything. But then…

“I will. It has to be me. I’m the only one strong enough to take it.” Bruce announced.

There was an outburst of protest, but he waved the objections away stubbornly.

“It would kill any of you.” He said sadly, and moved to pick the gauntlet up. No one tried to stop him – recognizing the determination in his voice. Instead you all moved back and shielded yourselves from what might be about to happen. Tony produced two shields, one for you and one for Clint, and you gave him a grateful but worried smile.

The gauntlet expanded to fit Bruce’s massive hand, and he yelled in pain as soon as it was fully on. You could hardly bear to watch as he dropped to his knees, roaring and obviously in complete agony, and you knew the others felt the same.

“Someone get it off of him!”

“No, wait! Leave him!”

Half in awe of Bruce’s strength, half in complete terror, you watched as he managed to bring his fingers together painstakingly slowly… and snapped.

There was no flash of light, no burst of power or energy… nothing happened.

Bruce collapsed to the floor, shaking and literally smoking. Everyone instantly surrounded him; Clint yanked the gauntlet off of his hand and kicked it across the room, and Tony blasted Bruce’s arm with cool water from his suit.

“M okay, fine, yeah.” Bruce mumbled in response to everyone’s frenzied questions.

“Did it work?”

You looked up to see Scott walking over to the window, and, convinced you were leaving Bruce in more suitable hands than yours, followed him. As you approached the window you heard a sound you had heard very rarely in the last five years… birdsong. Stopping next to Scott, you felt your heart swell.

“It worked.” He whispered, as if scared to say the words in case it became untrue.

It had worked – really worked! Looking at each other incredulously, Scott called back to the others.

“It worked! Guys – “

Even if you had realized that alarms were going off all around the compound and that it had been put into lockdown – nothing could have ever prepared you for the attack the was about to be launched on your home. There was no time to yell or shout, one minute you were stood next to Scott at the window, and the next the world had exploded around you. You felt yourself falling for a second, and then blacked out, either from the noise or the sheer weight of material that was falling down around and with you.

“Y/N? Y/N!? Come on Y/N, please wake up. Wake up!”

You opened your eyes groggily, and coughed in the dusty air that surrounded you. Looking around, it didn’t take long for you to work out that you were buried under a huge amount of rubble and debris: The Avengers compound… your home. Angry tears filled your eyes as you realized that an attack on that scale wouldn’t have just damaged the compound – it would be completely destroyed. Overwhelmed with a million emotions at once you let out a desperate sob: you didn’t know where you friends were or if they were even alive, you were buried, and your home had been destroyed by… well, there was only one person you knew capable of doing this. Thanos. He had found a way to time travel and had definitely bought his army too… you prayed the gauntlet and the stones in were safe hands.

Coughing again, you tried to move your arm to wipe the tears from your face, or was it sweat, or blood?

“Y/N!”

You jumped, as much as jumping was possible when trapped in a confined space underground, and turned your head frantically.

“Scott!?”

“I’m here! Are you alright?” he replied, from right next to your face, and you finally caught sight of a tiny ant-sized Scott stood by your face.

“Thank god… I think I’m fine Scott, are you okay? Can you contact the others?” you asked worriedly.

“I’m fine, I managed to shield us both from most of the attack by growing, but then when

I shrank again everything shifted and I thought I crushed you… but you’re okay.” He sounded immensely relieved.

“I tried contacting the others – I can’t hear anything from them.” He continued, sounding as worried as you felt.

“I’m sure they’re okay.” You said, trying to reassure yourself as much as anything.

“Thank you Scott – you’ve just saved my life.”

“Only just.” He replied, shaking his head. “I could’ve protected the others too…”

There was a huge groan from above you, and you could feel the debris shifting and falling constantly all around you.

“This isn’t safe, we need to get out of here.” Scott urged.

“Agreed, but how? If you grow you’ll be an easy target for…”

You stopped talking abruptly as there was a huge rumble of thunder from the sky above, which shook the ground and dislodged everything around you once again.

“I feel like Thanos has already got competition!” Scott exclaimed, and started to grow fast.

“Jump into my hands!” he told you, pushing up through the debris which consequentially came raining down on you. You ducked into his cupped hands which were now the size of a small car, and were lifted up and out of the remains of the compound.

Scott set you down on a ledge protruding from the debris.

“I need to find the others.” He told you determinedly.

“Be careful.” 

“And you.”

As Scott disappeared back down into the rubble, you turned around and were met with an awesome but frightful scene.

Tony, Steve and Thor were going head to head with Thanos. You scanned around for the gauntlet, but it was nowhere to be seen. Good. The sky thundered angrily, and lightning strikes hit the earth regularly with fearful strength and power; you felt pride in Thor – this was who he really was. Every fiber of your being wanted to charge down into the battle and help, but you knew you would be little use against Thanos, despite your hours of extensive training with… no. Stop thinking about Loki. This wasn’t the time – the fate of the earth was literally hanging in the balance right before your eyes.

Your resolve was tested when Thor, and then Tony were both put out of play by Thanos, and then Steve who, even when wielding Mjolnir, couldn’t overcome him. As you watched Steve struggle to his feet, alone, you started towards him out of pure instinct, but stopped when Thanos’ army came pouring from the ship behind him. Now Steve looked even more alone, but you were quite literally paralyzed with fear as you beheld the full forces of Thanos.

There was nothing left to do; it was completely hopeless. A lost cause.

Just as you thought that you would go and stand with Steve and die fighting, you saw the light. Literally.

Following Steve’s gaze, you beheld a familiar orange glow, which made a fizzing noise as it span and rather resembled a sparkler.

You actually felt yourself go light-headed as a tidal wave of relief seemed to crash over you, and an actual grin broke out on your face, your face which ached from a lack of smiling for five years.

It had worked.


	5. Come back to me (pt.5)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You’re one of the few Avengers who survived the snap, and you’re mourning the loss of all your friends who didn’t survive the snap, and Loki, your soulmate, who has died at the hands of Thanos. Five years later, when Scott Lang comes up with the idea of time travel and Tony manages to work it out, a glimmer of hope emerges, and you have a final chance to save your friends… and maybe even Loki.

As you watched the portal grow larger, three familiar faces appeared within. T’Challa, Shuri and Okoye stepped out and positioned themselves next to Steve, with determined looks on their faces. Other portals were appearing all over the place, and you could barely contain yourself as you saw your friends’ faces emerging all around you: Peter, Bucky, Stephen, Wanda, Sam, Valkyrie (on an actual Pegasus), they were all there. Then the Wakandan army made its entrance, accompanied by huge warships which flew through airborne portals. You turned your gaze to Thanos, and were satisfied to see that he was looking significantly less confident than he had been two minutes ago.

Thor was back on his feet and helping Tony up, and you spun around as there was an explosion from the wreckage behind you. A giant-sized Scott set Rocket, Rhodey and an injured Bruce down near you and then became normal sized again. You rushed over to Bruce, but he waved the four of you away impatiently.

“Go! Go and fight. I’m fine, go!” he demanded.

Heeding his command, you ran/slid down the pile of debris you had been standing on to join the ever-growing crowd of support. Steve looked as determined as ever, and you fought to contain your elation – you still hadn’t won yet. But you would.

Seeing that you were empty handed, Shuri handed you a sword from her belt – she had four. You nodded and smiled your thanks, and suddenly the battlefield was deadly silent. You could practically feel the tension crackling through the air like electricity, although that might’ve just been Thor.

“Avengers!” Steve said, in a loud voice that seemed to carry across the whole battlefield.

“Assemble.”

And you charged.

The noise was immense; everyone was yelling and screaming and shouting as they ran forwards to meet Thanos’ army, and the sound was full of anger and sadness for all that Thanos had taken from everyone, but it was also filled with hope, hope that soon this would all be over.

There was no time to prepare yourself, and you couldn’t have stopped running if you had tried: pure adrenaline carried you forward with everyone else. The sword in your hand was flawlessly balanced and fit in your hand perfectly – probably some sort of clever Wakandan technology. Needless to say, when you entered the battle, your opponents stood no chance.

You’d never even seen or heard of half of the creatures you were fighting; you didn’t have much time to look at them before you killed them anyway. As you fought, your brain went into autopilot, remembering the hours of training you’d done with Loki, years ago now, but you’d practiced enough that you remembered all the tricks and techniques he had taught you. You spent so much time telling yourself not to think about Loki, but now you allowed your brain to flood with memories, not just fighting techniques but just memories of him. How much you missed him. Now you poured that emotion into the fight, spinning and slashing and stabbing, all the while thinking of… Loki?

You nearly dropped your sword as you saw it – the helmet; not just any helmet. His. That was Loki’s helmet. Those were his golden horns, moving above the heads of everyone else not thirty feet away. The raging battle around you faded into background noise as you stared at that glimpse of gold, how could…?

Too late, you saw the black blur hurtling towards you out of the corner of your eye, and before you could even raise your sword to defend yourself you were slammed into the ground and had the breath knocked out of you, and your sword knocked from your hand. Winded, you looked desperately to where your sword was lying just inches away from your fingers; you reached for it urgently, very aware of the creature which was raising its claws and most likely about to slash your face off.

The rattle of machine gun fire sounded loud over your head. You instinctively closed your eyes, but then felt the creature fall off of your chest, allowing you to breathe again. Gasping for breath as you opened your eyes, you felt yet another smile break out on your face. Bucky was stood over you looking smug, holding out a hand. You grabbed it, pulled yourself up and tackled him into a hug, suddenly emotional. God you’d missed him so much. He hugged you back tightly, shooting another couple of creatures over your shoulder for good riddance.

“Hey Y/N, catch up later alright, gotta kill some bastards.” Bucky grinned, wielding his guns.

“Be careful!” he called over his shoulder as he ran off.

“And you!” you yelled back; your morale having been lifted from seeing him.

Suddenly you remembered the reason he’d had to save you in the first place, and spun around, keeping your sword raised this time in case of another incoming attack, trying to catch a glimpse of gold again. Maybe you’d imagined it – you had been deep in thought about him after all, but it had looked so real. What if he was… no. No. He was dead. You wouldn’t allow yourself to have your hopes raised.

You fought more and more creatures, beginning to get tired, but carrying on as you saw glimpses of your friends faces around you every so often, knowing that as long as they were fighting you would fight too. Soon however, things began to get more interesting. And dangerous. Thanos’ ship suddenly and unexpectedly began to fire randomly at the battlefield below, forcing everyone to run for cover, which there wasn’t a lot of. Stephen and his friends created huge shields above themselves, but they couldn’t shield everyone – including you.

You threw yourself behind the corpse of a huge beast which lay on the ground, and tried not to breathe through your nose (the smell wasn’t great), praying that you wouldn’t be caught in the line of fire. The ground not ten feet away from you exploded, and you edged closer to your only unfortunate form of cover. Without the adrenaline from the battle running through your veins, you began to feel injuries you had accumulated, and even worse, started to worry about your friends. They were fine – they would be fine. You repeated this to yourself sternly, trying to ignore the ground exploding around you left right and center, when suddenly… it stopped.

Looking up, you watched as the weaponry on Thanos’ ship turned skywards, and began to fire at what was seemingly nothing. But suddenly a bright streak of pure light was shooting towards the ship at an incredible speed; your heart lifted as you watched Carol fly in to save the day. Captain Marvel didn’t stop or hesitate as she smashed straight through the side of the ship, out the other side, and then back for round two, and the shields had been put down again: the battle commenced, accompanied this time by the sound of Thanos’ ship being demolished.

You drew your sword for a third time and ran towards where the battle looked thickest – maybe that’s where the gauntlet was. And Thanos. Not giving yourself any time to think about how shattered you were, you charged back into the fight. A while later you saw Peter flailing over your head with the gauntlet clutched in his hands, and landing on the back of Valkyrie’s Pegasus which swiftly flew off. That answered your question of where the gauntlet was – at least it wasn’t in enemy hands.

Soon you realized why the fighting was so thick here – Thanos was simply stood, surrounded by his ugly creatures which were protecting him. Anger boiled inside you; he wasn’t even fighting, just watching others fight and die around him. Blinded with rage, you fought increasingly harder to get closer to the center, working twice as hard… until suddenly you weren’t.

You fell face first through the snarling creatures to land right at Thanos’ feet. How had that happened? Heart racing, you scrambled to your feet and raised your sword, hearing your friends call your name from outside the circle of Thanos’ protection.

“Y/N is it? I remember you.” Thanos said, regarding you with his calculating, mean eyes.

You trembled, but not from fear. The rage coursing through your blood made you shake. Of course he remembered you, the simple Midgardian he had imprisoned in a protective shield; from behind which you had been helpless as you watched Loki die, right after he had destroyed the ship carrying all the Asgardians. You had been in a specially made space suit, and somehow the Guardians had found you and Thor floating through space together afterwards. That had been the day your life was ruined.

Staring back at Thanos with all the hatred in the world in your eyes, you refused to break eye contact. He was the reason for all of this, the reason you had lost so many friends and family for so long – it was all him.

“Don’t listen to him Y/N!”

“Y/N! Get out of there!”

Steve and Thor were just a few of the voices you could hear from the battle still raging behind you, but you could barely hear them. Still glaring at Thanos, you reminded yourself that without the gauntlet, he was just the same as any other villain. And you wanted this villain dead.

The rage that you had been keeping below the surface suddenly boiled over, and you swung your sword fast and true towards Thanos’ face – the only vital part of him not protected by armor. He raised his arm to deflect your blow, but only just, and you swung again, this time managing to catch his face with the end of your blade.

You stumbled back, raising your sword again; only fully beginning to realize that taking on Thanos one on one probably hadn’t been the smartest idea you’d ever had. He touched the place on his cheek where you’d cut him, and examined the blood on his fingers.

“Impressive.” He remarked, regarding you coldly.

Completely panicking at this point, you remembered his earlier fight with Tony, Thor and Steve, maybe he’d been weakened enough that you could finish him…

All of a sudden your feet left the ground as Thanos lifted you into the air by your neck.

Shit. No.

“Unfortunately, not impressive enough.” He finished.

Your sword fell from your hand as you clutched at his arm desperately, trying to draw a breath.

The shouts of your friends intensified from outside the circle; thunder crackled through the air stronger than ever before – you know Thor was trying to save you. The lightning that rained down from the sky was so intense you could feel the heat, but none struck Thanos, because that would mean striking you too. Thanos might survive, but you would not.

“Your friends care about you deeply; do you think they will be disheartened when I kill you?”

So that’s how you’d got past his protection, he had let you in. To kill you.

Black spots started dancing in front of your eyes as you choked, and tears streamed from your eyes. Not like this, you couldn’t go like this. This had been the last thing Loki would have seen, and now it was about to be your last sight too. You squeezed your eyes shut and pictured Loki, you wanted him to be the last thing you saw, not Thanos’ cruel face. You thought you could hear Loki calling your name…

Just as you were about to lose consciousness, you felt something fly close past your face, and then heard Thanos roar in pain. His grip loosened and you fell hard to the ground, clutching your throat and gasping for breath. What had saved you? Looking up, you saw Thanos yanking a dagger out of his face and roaring in pain yet again.

But that wasn’t just any dagger.

It was Loki’s.


	6. Come back to me (pt.6)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You’re one of the few Avengers who survived the snap, and you’re mourning the loss of all your friends who didn’t survive the snap, and Loki, your soulmate, who has died at the hands of Thanos. Five years later, when Scott Lang comes up with the idea of time travel and Tony manages to work it out, a glimmer of hope emerges, and you have a final chance to save your friends… and maybe even Loki.

Staring at Loki’s dagger as Thanos threw it to the ground, you felt yourself grow lightheaded again. You didn’t want to turn around in case it wasn’t true, but judging from the incredulous look on Thanos’ usually expressionless face, you were sure that Loki Laufeyson was standing right behind you.

That did it. Lack of oxygen and the fact that your five years dead boyfriend was apparently back from the dead and stood behind you combined was too much for you brain. You fought to stay conscious, but your body had other plans, and everything went black.

“Y/N.”

Loki’s voice drifted through your brain, and you unconsciously smiled. He had such a nice voice. You missed him…

“She’s not dead is she? Don’t let her be dead…”

“She’s not dead, I would know.”

“… and then she just went right up to Thanos and attacked him… she had a good go…”

As several other voices invaded your brain too, you began to regain consciousness.

You opened your eyes. 

And saw Loki’s face looking down on you.

He was smiling.

He had lost his helmet, his hair was a mess, he was covered in dirt and blood and he had a painful looking black eye. But to you he had never looked more beautiful.

At first, you didn’t move. You just stared at him. That face that you’d missed so much, it was right there. Which could mean only one thing…

“Am I dead?” you whispered hoarsely.

Incredibly, Loki looked on the verge of tears, but was still smiling at you like you were the best thing he’d seen in a long time. Which, for the record, you were. You’d never seen him express so much emotion around anyone who wasn’t, well… you.

“No love, you’re alright.” He whispered back, touching your cheek.

The enormity of his words came crashing down on you and you almost passed out again, he was alive. Loki was alive; this time in the present day, not in 2012. Tears filled your eyes; a million questions flew through your mind, but right now you didn’t care about the answers to any of them. ‘He’s come back to me’ you thought; the words echoed through your brain a thousand times over.

Your hand found his, and you squeezed, making sure he was really truly real.

“I missed you so much.” You said, so quietly it was barely audible. He shook his head with a smile, as if unable to comprehend that you were in front of him. You knew the feeling.

“Can you sit up?” Loki asked, swiftly drying his eyes with the back of his hand. He would have hated for anyone else to see him in any way emotional. You nodded, and he helped you up. Your whole body ached, which was fair enough you thought, considering what had just happened to you.

“Where did- “

“One of his minions came over to tell him our side had the gauntlet.” Loki told you, before you had finished. Another thing you had missed – having someone who could read your mind, who knew what you were going to say before the words even came out of your mouth.

“Oh, no, we have to go and help.” You said, trying and failing to get to your feet as a sharp pain shot through your side.

“Ow…”

“You’re not going anywhere.” Loki told you, catching you as you collapsed back down in a heap.

“We can’t just sit here!” you said indignantly. And then realized what was actually happening. You were talking – arguing with Loki. Who was sat next to you. Alive.

“We’re staying here until a can heal you enough to- “ he was cut off as you grabbed his face in both your hands and kissed him. For a moment you didn’t care that you were sat next to a battlefield where a fight that the Earth’s fate depended upon was taking place, or that Thanos might have the gauntlet again… there was only Loki.

You pulled back and took a deep breath; Loki cupped your face in his hands and stared at you in a look that could only be described as utter adoration. Those gorgeous eyes of his would be the end of you, you were sure of it.

“As much as I would actually love to sit here forever, we have to go and help.” You told him, resting your forehead against his.

“Okay, you’re done healing now.” He said, moving to stand up – you realized he had been healing you while you kissed. It had healed you in more ways than one, you thought to yourself; you felt whole, truly whole again for the first time since the day you had lost him.

He helped you to your feet and handed you your sword.

“What happened to your eye?” you asked in concern, touching it gently.

“Thor.”

“What! Thor did that!?”

“I thought you wanted to go and help!” Loki responded, raising his eyebrows. You decided not to press the matter any further.

“Now, grab my arm.” He told you, and you gave him a confused look.

“Just do it?”

You took his arm, and suddenly you were right back near the battlefield.

“Whoa – how did…”

“I’ll explain later, stay close to me, okay?” he said, looking worriedly at you.

“I will, don’t worry.” You replied, smiling ruefully. As if you were ever going to let him out of your sight again. Your brain still couldn’t fully comprehend that he was here; half of you still thought you might have died.

You both plunged back into the battle, this time fighting as a team.

Feeling better after he’d healed you, and with Loki at your side, you were fighting better than ever. But when the first creature in front of you turned to dust, you were sure it had nothing to do with your skill with a sword.

The first emotion you felt was fear.

Not again.

You frantically turned and grabbed on to Loki’s arm. You wouldn’t lose him again, you refused to. Everyone had stopped fighting, and was looking around in a mixture of fear and confusion.

“It’s okay Y/N, look.” Loki said, pointing. None of your side were turning to dust, it was just Thanos’ army. The threat was being washed away, just like that, blowing away with the breeze.

“Someone used the gauntlet.” you breathed. But who?

All of a sudden it was deathly quiet.

The only noise was coming from a group of people on the other side of the battlefield to you; it sounded panicked. Who was it? Rhodey? And… Pepper. Your heart stopped. You watched Peter swing over, drop to the ground and stumble over to the little group. No. No.

Your knees gave out, but Loki caught you before you could hit the ground.

“Y/N? What is it?”

“Tony…” you tried to say, but no sound came out. You were numb.

Loki was supporting your full weight now, but seemed to have understood what was going on.

In an instant you were next to them: Rhodey, Pepper and Peter, who were surrounding Tony. You left Loki’s side and dropped to your knees next to Peter.

Tony didn’t look so good. His whole arm was ruined, burnt so badly it was completely black and smoking – and it seemed to be spreading: half of his face looked just as burnt too. Peter was sobbing and telling him that ”we won, we won Mr. Stark – please don’t go…”

Rhodey looked devastated, and Pepper… she was her usual composed, calm self, stroking Tony’s hair and even forcing a brave smile when he managed to turn his gaze towards her.

“We’ll be okay.” She whispered – you knew she was referring to her and Morgan. Little Morgan. You held back a sob, not wanting to cry in front of Pepper while her whole world was being torn away from her, and wanting Tony to know you were okay.

Tony’s eyes swept the group one last time; you stared determinedly back, telling him with your eyes: it’s okay, you did it, we won, you can rest now… don’t cry Y/N, don’t cry…

You watched as the light faded from Tony’s eyes, and the blue light from the arc reactor winked out.

Peter pressed a hand against his mouth, shaking; you watched as Pepper finally lost it and sobbed into the side of Tony’s head, refusing to let him go. Rhodey moved forward in an almost robotic manner to comfort her.

Tears streamed down your face, you felt sick, your heart felt as if it had just been ripped out of your chest. Tony couldn’t be dead. He was Tony, Tony Stark. Iron Man. Iron Man didn’t die. And yet there Tony lay, lifeless, and there was nothing you could do about it.

He had just literally, single-handedly, saved the universe.

Peter made a choking noise to your left, and you turned to him, unable to stand the sight of Tony lying in front of you anymore. Peter… like you, Tony had been the dad he’d never had – you two had been good friends before… all this. He was another friend taken away from you for five years; you hugged each other tightly, clinging to one another, able to understand the others’ pain.

When you looked up again, mostly everyone, at least one hundred people, had gathered around the small group; you and Peter hastily stood up. You were reluctant to move away from Tony, but recognized that many, many people were grieving his death.

Pepper was still holding on to him.

Wanda came forward to comfort Peter, looking devastated herself, and before you even had to look for Loki he was by your side, drawing you close to him wordlessly.

That night was an emotional one.

You ran out of tears to cry: hugging people who had been lost to you for the past five years and talking to people you never thought you’d see again was emotionally draining.

Thor had given you a bone-crushing hug which you thought might break your spine when you saw him, and to Loki’s immense surprise he was next.

“Sorry about your eye.”

The Avengers Compound was out of action (you and the others were devastated – “we’ll rebuild it” Bruce told you in what he might have perceived as a confident tone), so everyone was ferried through a portal to somewhere safer, Wakanda maybe. You were so tired by this point you wouldn’t have noticed if they’d taken you to the moon.

What you did know was that Loki was with you the whole time, giving you the strength to not just curl up on the floor and cry some more. Everyone looked shocked when they saw Loki, presumably because you’d spent the last five years mourning his death in front of them, but no one asked questions. They would come later.

You tried not to think about Tony. Or the hug you and Peter had given Pepper which had made her start crying again. Or Morgan.

But especially not Tony.

At one point everyone was given food, drink and medical attention in a huge hall somewhere, and people started settling down on the floor for the night. You guessed it was already about 2am, and could barely keep your eyes open. 

Eventually, Loki sat you down on the floor, took his cape off and sat down next to you. He wrapped you in his cape and pulled you against him, wrapping an arm around you so that you could rest against him. You closed your eyes, feeling the weariest you’d ever felt.

Today, you had travelled back in time eleven years and encountered Loki’s worst version of himself, stolen an Infinity stone, lost Natasha, had your home demolished and been buried alive, fought in the biggest battle probably ever to happen in the history of the world, attempted to fight Thanos one on one, nearly been killed, seen the love of your life come back from the dead, and now lost the only father figure you’d ever had.

Everything about you ached, your brain, your heart, your whole body. You didn’t think you could take much more, but there was one question you had to have answered.

“How did you do it?” you whispered to Loki; your voice still hoarse from being strangled by Thanos, despite Loki’s best efforts at healing you completely.

You felt his arm tighten around you slightly.

“It took time for me to work out… I’m still not exactly sure.” He replied hesitantly. You stayed silent, waiting for him to continue.

He explained about alternate timelines, the tesseract, and the quantum realm, none of which really made sense to you. There was only one part you really cared about anyway.

“I knew I had to get back to you. I came back the second I knew how.”

You believed him.

Hundreds of questions were still flying around your head, but you couldn’t voice them, your throat still hurt, and you were so tired…

You were just listening to Loki’s heartbeat, a sound which eventually (accompanied with him stroking your hair) sent you off to sleep.

Later

Tony’s funeral was a quiet affair – at his and Pepper’s cabin in the woods, next to the lake.

His sendoff was beautiful, and everyone who he would’ve wanted to be there was there.

Surrounded by your friends and family, you knew this would be the hardest thing you’d ever have to do, that any of you would ever have to do: live in a world forever without Tony Stark.

But what you also knew was that he had saved every last one of you, and if he’d had to go, this is how he would’ve wanted it to be.

Loki was by your side, as he had been ever since the day of the battle, and he squeezed your shoulder as a tear slipped down your cheek. You wiped it away hastily.

Another thing you knew was that, as long as you had Loki by your side, everything would be alright.

And this time, you were sure that in time, it really would be.


End file.
